December 17, 2012 § 3 Comments
Days die the quiet death of night and another month goes by without a post. WordPress to Facebook link is not working still so I have to manually advertise my posts, not something I am happy to do. I am still laptop less with not one hour a day I could dedicate to myself. And the list of things I have forgotten to write about is getting so long, I do not know if there is a point at all to document this kind of a life.
I do not know where to start and how best to tell this story of mine. How to speak when words are failing and most importantly how to live with this storyline which seems to be leading nowhere. I pray in the middle of the night when nightmares wake me, I pray like a child with my needs laid out in front of my weak arms, with my fears bigger than the dark, I pray for this and that but all I want is to feel safe again. To not care, to not know that there are questions to the answers, to sit in the shade and watch the grass grow. To know that if I hug, I will be hugged back, to know that I am important, beautiful, amazing and that I have nothing else to worry about.